Notes:-Afternoon walk along the canal to Polesworth. Another shit week with the exception of Harrys prom. Fell out with Sarah last night, we had an argument on Thursday night about washing. She had told me off for doing it on Wednesday but then told me off on Thursday for not doing the washing as Tom needed a shirt for work. Last night we fell out about walking Simba. I had been busy all day sorting the house, getting shopping and helping Harry get ready for camp. I made Sarah and harrys dinners then took him to camp. Weather was too hot to walk him at 4 so assumed Sarah or Tom would walk him while I was taking Haz to camp. Sarah has been walking him for the past few months. Got home, watched a bit of Tv with Sarah then headed upstairs with a coffee as she wanted to watch love island. A few mins later she called up to say I needed to walk Simba… so I asked if Tom could, or Sarah herself. Comment was Tom has been at work…. Which set me off…just because Im not working why does that mean I have to do everything else… all the shit jobs no one else wants to do. I had also been busy all day, literally not stopping until I got back at 6.30 after dropping Harry up by Cannock chase. So we had a big row… apparently I was pulling the im not working card… Sarah is under stress from various fronts, not least her brother implementing her in a dodgy scheme to use his kids inheritance to pay off his mortgage early. Shes also worried about us leaving her when we go to Skye. Im feeling the pressure on that as well. Wish we had never planned to do it. Last year was a disaster so why did I think we could go this time without problems. Sis suggested mum went into restbite care while Mark and I were on Skye, which I didnt agree with. So feeling guilty about leaving Sarah and not being easily available if something happens to Mum…. I also have to think about Tom and Harry who will be so disappointed if we dont go. Mark would also miss out on a holiday which above anyone else he needs and deserves. So this tie next week I will either be on Skye with Tom, Harry and Mark or sat at home… let’s see what happens. Also job front is dismal… I feel pretty low and worthless at the minute so when I get challenged about doing housework and chores it just makes me feel worse. Thats all Im good for, and im not even very good at it.
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